General Discussion Board
A heart-felt post to all of us........
Posted By: Sandie Zitkus <szitkus@co.freei.net> (209.252.114.44)
Date: Thursday, 4 May 2000, at 6:51 p.m.concerning the disagreement that is going on right now on this board about a website that some are upset about and some found funny.
When I stopped pointing my finger at others and started pointing it back at me - it was amazing how my attitude changed for the better. It's not about making other's agree with you or changing peoples minds it's about allowing people to have the opinion they have without beating other's over the head with yours. It's about knowing what's right for you and giving other's the opportunity to find what's right for them and letting it be that way.
In life we have a choice - to think the way we do and allow other's the right to do that too or spend most of our time beating our heads against the wall trying to make the whole world be what we want it or need it to be. The thing is you can't do that -it just doesn't work. You wind up being angry all the time. Now if that is how you want to live your life - more power to you far be it for me to make anyone do what they don't want to do with their life. It's just not how I choose to live my life anymore.
I just think "tolerance" is a word that is not used enough in our society. Tolerance of other's is a gift. It doens't make you week - in fact it makes you stronger because from tolerance comes acceptance of others and from accpetance comes love. I am not saying accept or tolerate things that are truly offensive - but what is offensive? Do we ever think about why we find certain things offensive? Is it truly offsive or did it hit a nerve or an open wound? That's a tough question to be really honest with yourself about. To ask yourself "Why am I so upset by _____?" Can take you to places in your heart and soul that you had no intention of ever visiting again - and it can be painful BUT in the long run very healing. To heal an open wound that you thought had long since healed can be a life changing experience.
That may be why we choose to argue a point to exhaustion instead of just allowing other's to have their point of view and getting on with it. To truly accept another for who they are is difficult for us as human beings to do - very few of us can do that - but to strive to be that "kind" is a truly noble thing to strive for in my opinon. Beleive me I in no way beleive I have gotten to that point and I am not sure if too many humans ever get there while on this earth - but I feel it is a part of our lesson here to learn to truly love without judgement.
We could go on and on for days about a site that we don't like but why? Does what was posted make the person who posted it a bad soul? I don't think so - it makes them human - just like all of us. Does finding it funny make some of us bad or illinformed or insensitive? No - it makes us human. Does being offended by it all make us over-sensitive or touchy? No. It makes us human. See where I am going with this? :) We are all human and as such falable - let's give each other a break and accept that we are going to disagree from time to time and that's OK. Every time we disagreeing we have the chance to see another's way of looking at the world - and that is a gift - because the only hope we have for peace and brotherly love is the hope that one by one we can try to see how the other perosn looks at the world and respect that vision as we want our own to be respected.
At least that's the way I see it. :)
Sandie Z